Thanks to Workmates I'm Safe - 6 September 2016
I guess my situation was made more difficult because I am the boss, so it took a lot for my staff to pull me aside and find out what was going on. I think they always knew that life was difficult with my husband.
He was very obviously controlling, but very careful to put the bruises where they couldn't be seen (at least, without me stripping off). He was very adamant that we could not socialise with anyone who knew he was violent, so controlled who I could talk to. It came to a head after I had been to a work conference with two of the girls from work. We had a good week, but when I got home he was really angry that I had defied him and gone on the trip, so he beat me up and threw me out of the bedroom (literally). I was limping at work the next day and obviously miserable. I didn't know what to do.
He controlled the money - he had 500k plus in his bank account while I was only allowed about $500 - not enough to rent a property, let alone hire a moving truck.
One of the girls organised her husband to help me move, while another gave me and my son rooms in her home to shift into. We had a window of only a few hours to pack fast and get out. I was terrified. I now have a protection order against him, and he has been convicted of domestic assault. He was fined $500 plus court costs (and probably $50,000 in lawyers fees), and has to pay me $3500 in victim reparation (haven't received that yet). He was on Facebook out celebrating with his new girlfriend after the court hearing - $3500 to him is chicken feed - and they are both happy he avoided jail (what kind of woman celebrates her new boyfriend not going to jail after assaulting his wife - and previous wife - for over 25 years in total - does she seriously think it won't happen to her?!)
Anyway, without my workmates, I would still be getting beaten, and forced to sleep in the spare room (unless of course I grovelled and apologised like every other time). Love them
For information about how businesses can be involved in supporting people affected by family violence see: www.areyouok.org.nz/i-want-change/business/
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